LAST week, I bit one of my fingernails right down to the quick.
It isn’t a particularly outrageous thing to do, but I found it personally frustrating, because my sort-of-New-Year’s-resolution is to finally stop biting my nails – it’s a habit I’ve had since childhood, and now I have small people at home I don’t want them to acquire the habit from me.
(Also, my parents never rescinded their “10p per fingernail we can cut” promise from when I was seven, so I could be onto a money-spinner here).
With one fingernail bitten down, there’s a real temptation to give in and chew the rest to match.
So far, I’m resisting. But I find that with New Year’s resolutions (or any other kind of personal commitment), if I’ve let it slip once it becomes harder and harder to keep it up.
I might commit to exercising twice a week, or limiting my screen-time, or whatever else, and it feels easy for the first week or so, but then it gets tougher and tougher until I miss a run or binge-watch YouTube for an evening, and that’s it. I’ve failed.
I’ve fallen short of my own (fairly limited) expectations; what’s the point in trying to continue?
Maybe I should just accept my failure and give up.
Or maybe not. Perhaps there’s a more forgiving way to look at this.
Jesus’ disciples once asked him how many times they should forgive someone, suggesting that seven might be a reasonable number.
Jesus replied with “Seventy-seven times”.
In the culture of the day, this was akin to replying with “Dozens” or even “Thousands” – it’s not the specific number that matters, but the sense that it’s not even worth counting.
Just forgive, and forgive, and forgive, over and over.
More famously, Jesus also said: “Love your neighbour as you love yourself” - treat others as we treat ourselves.
I can forgive someone else over and over again, and I can forgive myself too.
When I fail (with my resolutions, or even with the act of forgiveness), it’s okay to be kind, to accept that mistakes happen, to pick myself up and go again.
This year, try to be kind to yourself, to be kind to others, and to just let it all go – it’s good to forgive.
Dave Poulson
Associate Pastor
Crediton Congregational Church